Have you ever wondered why people choose the things that they choose? Why people decide to become dentists or lawyers, teachers and coaches? The grand majority of people choose what they do because they felt they had a place for it and a small majority of people made bad life choices and have to pick a job out of a catalog. Most people think that’s what coaches do…or at least our kind of coaches. Who wouldn’t think that we just picked canoe kayak coaching because we get spend everyday in the sun? I picked coaching because I knew I had something to see. That is what coaching is, it is seeing what others can’t. It is looking at someone and knowing something is not quite right even if they are certain everything is. My sensitivity to that just spreads everywhere.
I will never understand why people hide things, like their feelings or thoughts. Maybe it is the vulnerability that makes them scared to feel. I am starting to sound like Elsa from Frozen. If I have learned anything though, I would rather the world know who I am even if it is not the most pleasant of ideas, than have them believe that I am wall or a rock. Sports taught me that. My really good coaches could see what I couldn’t or what I wanted to hide. Once it was out there I could not deny it, well I could, but I would just be playing this big game of charades. Where they went right, and where I continuously go wrong is that they kept it to themselves until I was ready to talk. For some god forsaken reason once I know it is there it eats at me just as it would to them. The mature way of looking at it is perhaps the people themselves don’t know how to cope with it so why would they share it with someone else. My way of looking at it is, you have another pair shoulders who wants to share your burden, let it happen. But that is the other thing; people are afraid to ask for help. I was like that, I hated it. Then I realized that the true act of maturity is realizing you cannot live by yourself. Somewhere someone has helped you. That is why the world is separated by pessimists, optimists and realists. We like to think that we each act to our own but we all fit in one of those categories completely.
All I can say is, it’s not just a job. I live it, the way I coach is the way I act. Tears, anger, doubt and superstition. To the people whose lives I touch, I’ll share your burden any way and I will keep telling you that you can do it, over and over, until you finally realize it for yourself. Because I can see through you, but I’m working on being Elsa for a little bit.